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Still others may have never so much as held hands with someone who wasn’t a family member.Because of all of the importance placed on the concept of virginity, people are convinced that having passed some arbitrary cut-off point that they have rendered themselves utterly unfuckable and have somehow missed on a critical aspect of growing up.Meanwhile, we live in a culture that glorifies male sexual conquests even as it pathologizes male sexuality.We are taught to measure a man’s value by the number of sex partners he’s had; the more women he’s seduced, the greater the value.They may get older but they will never truly be Virginity has an outsized level of influence in Western culture, especially in countries with large conservative religious communities; the idea of sex and “purity” get completely intertwined and then but up against gender roles that completely contradict those values.Men are under as a rite of passage to adulthood is a deeply entrenched one; thus, men carry around the idea that you are still just a boy until you’ve managed to actually ejaculate into another person’s vagina, no matter how old you may be equates virginity with childhood.
I can’t count the number of letters I’ve gotten from virgin readers, men and women of just about every age who have not had sex yet and are desperately afraid that they’re “too late”.Some may have had physical intercourse with another person – oral sex, mutual masturbation, possibly even anal sex – but consider themselves virgins because they’ve never had penile/vaginal sex.Others may have had penetrative sex but not “count” it for one reason or another.Steve Carrell’s character may be middle-aged with a steady job, a sizable apartment, a car and presumably relatively debt free…
but because he’s never managed to actually penetrate a woman, he’s still obsessed with “childish” things.
For others it’s trying to beat a particular date – our 18th or 21st birthdays, high-school or college graduation, before summer’s over, before getting married.